The Night Before Wrath

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Polarside
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The Night Before Wrath

Post by Polarside » Tue Nov 11, 2008 3:13 pm

Got it off the WrathWiki site... Thought it was pretty cool.

Twas the night before WotLK, and in World of Warcraft
Not a creature would /stir, /sing, /dance, /silly, or /laugh
The servers were hung, all instancing ceased
In hopes the expansion would soon be released

The children were nestled all snug in their beds
(Only orcs; no young tauren, trolls, or undeads)
And I, in my brutal's gear, from PvP
Had just trekked to the inn for some rested XP

When out by the arena there arose such dissent
I wondered if Blizzard started a world event
I went into cat form, to ensure my good health
If scourge were invading, I was gonna be stealthed

The moon didn't light up the boring old dirt
(C'mon, some Orgrimmar snow couldn't hurt!)
When what should I see, out there on the streets?
Twas a musclebound orc, and a mess of elites!

He was giving out buffs, which were awesome but brief
I knew in a moment it was the warchief
Was he giving a quest, or was this an illusion?
He started to /yell as we watched in confusion

"Come raiders, and twinkers, and casuals too!
Come on PvPers, get out of your queue!
To the top of the bank, to the top of the wall!
You can dash, you can mount, you can even slowfall!"

He jumped on the mailbox, to give rise to himself
I feared for a moment he'd become a night elf
But he did not /dance, or remove all his gear
So we all gathered round, and we lent him our ear

And then, on the arena, I heard from the roof
The prancing of two dozen large tauren hoofs
As I drew in my head, visions of taurens prancing
I was distracted by an evil knight dancing

She was dressed in all epics, from her helm to her rings
They spat death coils and did other impressive things
A bundle of loot she had flung on her back
And in a scary voice she cried, attack!

Her eyes, how they glowed! Her body, so thin!
She had golden hair, and odd, death-colored skin!
Her droll little mouth was drawn up in a sneer,
As if immune to poly, stunlock, root, and fear

We all drew our weapons, and I readied my claws
I'd enjoy tasting blood dripping from my jaws
But Thrall raised his hammer, and let out a fierce growl
We all hesitated, hit by his piercing howl

"Her kind," he claimed, "are not our enemies!
They don't hide in shadows, they don't even eat babies!
They all hate scourge, and hope that they will die!
Even so, like alliance, kids will stare at her glowing blue eyes

But from out in the crowd, came a shout, "She's no scourge!
You can tell from the way she said lol Dirge!
Her hotbar has death coil and army of the dead adjacent!
You've brought us a target, we won't be complacent!"

"But you see," the elf said, her voice calm and malicious,
"I may have found the dark, but I find it delicious.
We stole from Arthas!" She screamed while she glowered.
"To mock claims that paladins are so overpowered!"

"But where," I responded, "Did you get all your loot?"
"My chestpiece has less stats than one of your boots!"
She took out her hearthstone, and said "Look Suzanne...",
As she showed me that it was now set to Dalaran

"I got them in Northrend, just as you will.
In a month your new set is as useless as twill.
The zeppelins that you have always sat on while bored
You know, when you levelled, that tower you ignored?"

"It's a land of new quests, and wondrous gifts,
Of casual content, and paradigm shifts.
So come to the zeppelin, if you'll continue playing,
And take on "You have been following my footsteps all along!" as your saying!"

She laughed and death gated, in true death knight fashion,
But in her wake I had found a new passion
In this new land I'd find epic apparel
Perhaps I would even find something for feral!

Thrall raised his hammer, and roared with all his power
Then he jumped on his mount and rode for the zeppelin tower
But I heard him exclaim, as we rode to our fate
"I hope when we get there, it will be release date!"

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